An interesting week

Having my “game face” on, I made it through another week. When your not feeling on top of your game one tends to have trouble keeping up (at least that’s how I feel). I had some interesting conversations this week, which provoke more thoughts and feelings. I’m all about rules, I also think the rules need to be “updated” staying true to the reason behind them in the first place. I have been consumed with thoughts of time, and calendars and seasons. Change is all round us, and everyone has an opinion about it. So did the Mayans not finish the calendar because it was the end? Or was it simply knowing things change? Seriously, winter isn’t really lining up with what it says on the calendar as well as any of the other seasons. Why is it when there are changes happening most humans focus on the doom and gloom rather than looking at things as a child and being excited to see what happens next? Is this all self preservation, or means of control?

Life has been interesting this week. With Interns and earthquakes, warranty work turning into auto body issues. Questions with responsibilities and accountability. I have been pondering the thought of excuses… What is the difference between excuse and mere fact? Excuses versus reasons? My father used to always tell me “right is always right and wrong is always wrong. Excuses are like assholes everybody’s got one”. Going through this game called life I have determined its not so clear cut. This could also be me just sitting on the fence, having yet to make a decision (making excuses). I try to be thoughtful, drawing a conclusion rather than jumping to one.

(taken Tuesday morning)

What a difference a week can make! Has the spring really sprung?

(taken Sunday morning)

39 things

39 things you may or may not want to know.

1. I hate camping (my idea of roughing it is a hotel without room service!)
2. I hate black ice (winters can be rough and black ice is SOOOOOOO dangerous!)
3. I hate folding socks! (I have a sock basket and match as needed)
4. I hate super hot food! (I like spicy and warm but as a kid I hated it all.  My taste buds have changed over the years…)
5. I hate carelessness… and the ill effects it causes
6. I’m terrified of spiders! (over the years I have gotten braver but they still make me squeal)
7. I’m still scared of something happening to my Boys (I have since added Max and Syd to my list) I get that our bodies are on loan to us, however as a parent… I pray that lot isn’t mine!
8. I’m scared of not having the answer… I’m used to being resourceful and I love to problem solve, the older I get I can feel myself slipping.
9. I used to be scared of the dark and had a nightlight in my room for MANY years… I have since learned to appreciate the dark and I’m glad of that.
10. I love to laugh (hence all the laugh lines that hug my eyes). Letting go of my vanity has been a bittersweet journey. I have visions of  being the Grammy with laugh lines so deep…
11. I love to cause laughter and feeling the energy it creates! (good stuff right there)
12. I love having funny dreams and waking up giggling!
13. I love being a mother (I measure my success as  a mother  by watching my Boys… when they open a door for a stranger, when they give of themselves with no level of expecting something in return, witnessing my  boys being supportive brothers,  becoming role models to others)
14. I love treasure (most of  my treasures have no monetary value… the majority of my “gold” are memories I have)
15. I love heated conversation (I’m not referring to arguments… I appreciate passion and rather I agree with the other person is irrelevant. I love to feel the power of  belief(s) and the ability to voice it respectfully)
16. I love music and the power it possesses… how a song can catapult you  back to a moment in time. How a melody can put a smile on your face or a  beat can cause you to uncontrollably tap your foot, drum your fingers or force you to stand and dance)
17. I love the feeling of family… (how I appreciate the security you feel when your family rally’s around to offer support, guidance, and love)
18. I love daisies. They are the most simple and happiest flower. The peddles have often  been used to draw conclusions… They love me, they love me not
19. I love pasta, plain, with  butter and garlic, with red sauce and white sauce…
20. I love fruit’s and veggies‘! Even as a kid I would prefer a plate of fresh fruit and vegetables as apposed to meat!
21. I love katsup… for whatever reason I have always thought that red sauce was magical and could make ANYTHING taste  better!
22. I LOVE carrot cake!!! If I knew who invented it I would totally kiss them right on their talker!!
23. I love history… Not the kind you would necessarily find in books, but the history you have created with the people who have loved you enough to stick around
24. I love the smell of the morning following a good hard rain
25. I love the smell of puppy  breath
26. I love the smell of freshly cut grass
27. I love the smell of baby lotion and powder on a new born
28. I love the rebel side of people and have long since respected the individuals that are unafraid to go against the grain of things
29. I love a hot bath or shower and the effects it has on my body
30. I love fairytales and the magical idea of Happily Ever After
31. I love the concept of super heroes… and all the groovy accessories!!
32. I love perspective… life tends to have to hit me over the head sometimes to help me see it. However when you are willing… growth can  be immeasurable
33. I love shiny things… I’m not really sure the reasoning behind this, but when things sparkle there is just something magical about them
34. I love the acts of giving… rather the recipient is aware of it, knows the guilty party, or even if its unappreciated… To give is an incredible gift, and NEVER fails to grow
35. I’m thankful for the gift of hope… I have been told my entire life having hope is powerful, giving hope is immense
36. I’m thankful for time… however much you get, I’m thankful for it, and try not to waste it
37. I’m thankful for enough… I have never really been a MORE type of person, I have a huge appreciation for having JUST enough!
38. I am thankful for the many love taps God has given me… A lot of them have felt  more like a God Smack which usually leaves a mark, but when your hard headed and stubborn a tap just doesn’t do the job
39. I have a love/hate feeling for change… I am learning not to fear it so much, and am able to see the importance of it!

So the closer I get to forty the more I realize I'm OLD! It's all good really. When I was kid I thought thirty was OLD, but changed my mind mid twenties! I have few regrets in my life (not to say I don't have any) the mistakes I have made... I tend to make them over and over again. Reason for that maybe some mistakes are just plain FUN! lol I have a few favorite mistakes but given the chance of a do over, I might side step it all together ;) Others it was a light bulb malfunction... either way this is has been quite the adventure. I have been pondering the thought of making a forties list, but I don't want to push the whole list issue seeing how I have a difficult time with them (lists that is).