Thursday, November 24, 2011

thankful...

marti-me-brenden
taken last sunday for our very thankful-not thanksgiving day but still had turkey-dinner :)
Gavone and Maximus
Gav reading one of his favorite books to his cousin Max

my life at 41 i have so many things i am truly thankful for.

  1. thankful for my health (so thankful)
  2. thankful for my boys (who i can count on for anything)
  3. thankful for my grandson (who currently says "mema, i love you" out of the blue)
  4. thankful for my family (yes we put the fun in dysFUNctional)
  5. thankful for all my friends that feel like family (so that means if i ever needed a kidney you guys probably couldn't help on that one lol)
  6. thankful for the strength i've been given genetically
  7. thankful for the strength i have developed spiritually
  8. thankful for the strength you can only get through the trial and error process
  9. thankful for the little moments in life that make me smile
  10. thankful for the moments that make me laugh hysterically
  11. thankful for moments of vulnerability
  12. thankful for even the sad moments of loss (because the space that is now empty was once filled with someone amazing).
  13. thankful for my imagination which paints my world with vibrant colors and music
  14. thankful for small acts of kindness leaving you with a warm heart
  15. thankful for mean and selfish people who are examples to me of what not to be
  16. thankful for flash lights and candles during the dark and twisty times
  17. thankful for united fronts
  18. thankful for the truth
  19. thankful for time
  20. thankful for long walks
  21. thankful for long talks and heated discussions
  22. thankful for wool socks
  23. thankful for season changes
  24. thankful for hand me down cloths
  25. thankful for old habits
  26. thankful for NEW habits
  27. thankful for quiet moments
  28. thankful for soft fuzzy blankets
  29. thankful for comfort foods
  30. thankful for the people who will answer my phone calls, no matter the hour
  31. thankful for stranger's who still open the door for others
  32. thankful for random smiles
  33. thankful for short but meaningful conversations during the check out lines :)
  34. thankful for a heart filled with hope
  35. thankful for silly dreams
  36. thankful for a job
  37. thankful for good books
  38. thankful for loud music to dance your frustrations away
  39. thankful for traditions
  40. thankful for a sense of humor that has seen me through many of hard times lol
  41. thankful for another wonderful thanksgiving day :)
wishing everyone a full day of thanks :)

Friday, November 11, 2011

11-11-11, 11:11am

i woke up this morning to the bright light of the full moon shining through my window (3:30 am-yeah this time change has my internal clock jacked up).
i really wish we could just move the clocks 30 minutes and leave it there! ya know, split the difference (i think this is my middle child approach to fixing things lol).

2011 has been an amazing year, filled with all sorts of extremes. lots and lots of highs- lots and lots of lows. the universe has a way of keeping things balanced, although when your standing too close, the lows tend to be difficult to see past...
(at least it had been for me)

there has been many of years i thought i was doing good if i could just breathe, and keep my feet moving. it wasn't until recently direction was introduced.
it happened over a friendly conversation, and from that moment i remind myself -when you are struggling to move your feet, it may mean ya need to ask for directions! 

One would think breathing is easy... fill your lungs-empty your lungs [repeat]. the past several months i have been faithfully practicing yoga (i say practicing cause if you have ever done yoga thoughts of "how the hell am i supposed to bend like that?" fills your mind).
so i stopped worrying about technique and picked a starting point. with each new morning it becomes easier. listening to my body, adjusting, breathing... ah yes, i was talking about breathing! this is when i discovered i hold my breath (A LOT) and NOT just when practicing the ancient exercise. i realized i have difficulty letting go of the breaths i take. breathe in and breathe OUT. so simple yet so freakin' complicated. learning to exhale... i recently came across a saying and i have been using this as a mantra - Relax Breathe Surrender. I find that last word i struggled with the most. you don't really have a choice when the universe throws curve balls- sometimes you are not supposed to swing at them- sometimes your not supposed to try and catch them- you do need to watch for them so ya don't get smacked upside the head (but we all know they can come out of no where and do JUST that). i think with surrender-realizing everyone has struggles-ups-downs-battles-wars-problems-limitations. EVERYBODY. its what you do next. surrendering to the idea you have no freakin' control over what comes at ya- its what ya do with what comes, and your follow through, that's what influences the game. you also may need better gear-stronger helmet, heavier bat, a well oiled glove. remembering its a team sport. people are going to let you down, betray you, make mistakes... they will also be your rock, stand next to you, and help you along through this game called life.  

i'm thankful. thankful i can feel love. see love. hear love. smell love. taste love. this helps me give love. this date is a bit magical... after all "we are all one". on 10-10-10, on 09-09-09, and on 08-08-08 the universe coming together...
=) makes my heart smile (=

Saturday, October 1, 2011

Hello October, my what beautiful colors your wearing.

hello october :)
i simply love fall, and all the goodies it brings
i love the crisp mornings
i love scarfs
i love wool socks
i love sweaters
i love the sunshine burning off the frost
i love the many shades of yellow and orange everywhere
i love when the leaves dance down the street
i love how soup tastes SO much better for lunch
i love that trick or treating is right around the corner =)

septembers are hard for me - the excess of emotions are unnerving. so before i say goodbye to another september, here is a recap.

i blew out an extra candle... making me officially IN my forties. starting another year with CaRrOt CaKe :) "carrot cake is our FaVorITe, mema" -max tells me =)
this birthday had an extra hiccup. this was the first year i didn't receive a card from my grams. the predictable card that would show up in my mail box either the day before or the day of. she was old school like that. picking out the perfect card, underlining words to emphasize her message...

my older sister, niece and i celebrated my fathers bday
he would have been 65

My oldest blew out bday candles too
...23...
you know what this means?!?!?! only 2 more years and he gets a break on his car insurance =)

we had a little superhero action
i just have to note putting him into the spiderman suit was a whole lot easier than getting him out of it lol

and a anniversary
11 years we have been without pop (i came across a picture my niece brandi made back in 2000)

my pop taught me
  • how to keep things simple
  • to slow down
  • to look around
  • to MAKE time to smell the flowers
  • he tried to teach me not to worry about things, but i still struggle with this one.
so, i say goodbye to september
and embrace all the comforts october brings me. 

Saturday, September 10, 2011

my epic "ca-ca-tion" part THREE

19AUG11
vancouver  island
tofino
tofino is a beautiful place. the beaches are like white silk almost.

this is the day we went whale watching
grey whale
hump back whale
these creatures are simply breathtaking...

Thursday, September 8, 2011

my epic "ca-ca-tion" part TWO

lets see where was i.... OH YEAH, the ferry ride over to vancouver island.
17AUG11
vancouver
vancouver island

st. pauls church with his feathered friends
we stayed in nanaimo. this too is an incredible place i will be coming back to :)
18AUG11
vancouver island
nanaimo
tofino

these is where we stayed and had breakfast
a nanaimo bar
its 3000 calories of goodness!!
more beaches
(qualicum beach)
I almost went cave exploring :)
(horne lake caves provincial park)
this made me laugh
cathedral grove
macmillian provincial park
this is one of the many examples of the circle of life. when a tree falls, new ones grow.
this was such an amazing sight. the road was two lanes and pulling off to the side was not an option. the mist circling the mountains was breathtaking.
"pacific rim"
later in the trip i learned that the locals called august "fog-ust" the fog would be thick and then in a moment the sun would burn it all off and there would be a blue skies.

19AUG11
tifino

and the fog could roll back in, just like that